Involve the family in planning the trip

Posted: Thursday, June 20, 2013 8:00 pm
By: By Tom Tozer and Bill Black

We are entering the season of family travel. This can be a time of excitement and anticipation but also dread as we plot how to cram several people — with varying ages and interests — into a four-wheeled mobile closet or figure out how to afford a seat in the friendly skies. Let’s face it … teens aren’t always the most enjoyable travel companions.
So, how do you make the summer excursion enjoyable and still maintain your sanity? Here are a few tips.
Travel planning
Plan the trip as a family. Include everyone. Sure, it will take longer to work out the details, but the result will often be more successful. Your teen will be more engaged if s/he is more involved in setting the destination and helping to choose activities.
Establish a budget. Keep it reasonable and plan it ahead of time. Just be sure to include some funds for a spontaneous event or two.
Often there is more than one way to reach your destination. Talk with your teen about the options. Could you rent a van instead of flying? Is the train an option?
Planning together will reap rewards and serve as a learning experience. So often, life calls us to work together with others for the welfare of the group. Learning this skill will be beneficial in the long run.
So now you have arrived
What about lodging? You might want an upscale, quiet resort, but your teen might enjoy a location closer to the action. Consider convenience and proximity. It will save you time. There’s nothing worse than spending half your day figuring out how to get somewhere. (And, dad, for heaven’s sake, seek directions!)
Food is absolutely crucial. Be sure to pick eateries that will appeal to your teen. They’ll enjoy it more. And if they enjoy it, you will, too.
Let everyone help set a flexible agenda
Again, your teen will be more engaged if s/he is more involved in setting the agenda. Think about what your response would be if someone planned a trip for you, determined your destination and decided what you would do and who you would see. You wouldn’t be too excited.
To find those special destinations, however, would a guided tour be better than trying to find your own way around? Sometimes allowing someone else to take the lead can save time and energy. And be open to change. After all, you have left your hard and fast schedule at home.
Let every family member pick an activity, find a restaurant or suggest an alternate event. Be flexible. Let your kids sleep in, have some time alone and, with appropriate precautions, do some independent exploring.
Honor the process
A summer family trip is not all about the destination. It’s also about the coming together of the family, sharing an experience, rediscovering one another and enjoying being together. Getting there should be just as fun as being there.
Tom Tozer of Nashville and Bill Black of Murfreesboro may be contacted at Dads2Dads@comcast.net. For more information, visit dads2dads.wordpress.com.

Published in The Messenger 6.20.13

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