Posted: Friday, July 20, 2012 8:04 pm
Dear Annie: I’ve been seeing “Bud” for a year. He lives in a trailer park and has a 23-year-old daughter who is on Bud’s checking account and charge cards. This girl insists that her mother (Bud’s ex-wife) spend weekends at the trailer, so Bud spends those weekends at my house. He will not tell his daughter no.
This has put some stress on our relationship. His daughter often buys things for her mother, and Bud pays the bills. I find this a little strange. Bud doesn’t understand my objections. He has no interest in saving for our future together.
My friends say that Bud is using me because I have a nice house. If I were to marry him, I would make him sign a pre-nup, because otherwise he would give away everything I have. Am I being naive about our relationship? — Can’t Take It Anymore
Dear Can’t Take It: You’re not naive. You understand what’s going on. But you don’t seem to accept your limitations when it comes to changing the situation. A pre-nup won’t solve your problem. Bud is going to continue to pay for his daughter’s bills. He will continue to acquiesce to her requests, including having her mother stay at his place. And you will continue to be miserable playing second fiddle to his daughter. Your decision is how best to respond to this.
Dear Annie: My husband is one of five sons. His parents recently passed away, and he is the executor of the estate and is in the process of selling their home. He got several estimates and selected the Realtor he felt would do the best job. One brother tried to get my husband to pick a friend, but my husband was not impressed with her. Another has been really nasty, telling my husband he should try harder to get more money from the sale.
My husband’s niece would like to buy the house. She made a reasonable offer, and my husband was happy to keep the house in the family. He called a family meeting, but only two brothers showed up, one of whom was the niece’s father. He said my husband should get the house appraised in case it was worth more money.
When my husband pointed out that the niece might not be able to afford the house if it’s priced any higher, her father said this is a business deal and to get as much money as possible.
This is upsetting my husband, who would love to sell to his niece. The two brothers already have stopped speaking to him, and before this is all over, the family may fall apart completely. What is your take? — All in the Family
Dear Family: When parents die, there is often fallout between siblings over money. But many times the real issue is the perception that one sibling was loved more than another. We suspect your husband was named executor because his parents thought he was the best choice to handle such things, which may also be the reason why he is getting so much resistance from his brothers. If the niece is offering a fair price for the house and your husband wants to sell to her, he should do so.
Dear Annie: “Sterling, Mass.” said, “Type 1 diabetes is an epidemic, and people with the disease aren’t going to wait to eat.” She should have said “Type 2.”
The CDC predicts that one out of every three people will have Type 2 diabetes by 2050. This form of diabetes is caused from a mixture of things, including heredity, eating and exercise habits. People with Type 2 diabetes may or may not use insulin.
Fast-acting insulins can begin to work in 10 to 15 minutes, so the person needs to start eating fairly soon after injecting. Others might be able to inject the insulin up to 30 minutes before the meal. — Advanced Diabetes Nurse Specialist/Educator, Transcultural Nurse Specialist
Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to firstname.lastname@example.org, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 Third St., Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. To find out more about Annie’s Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.
Published in The Messenger 7.20.12